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Wait for the next release. I want usable mugs damn it!

55 (71.4%)

We can use the current one. I like the big trees and slightly smarter dorfs.

17 (22.1%)

I'll take .34.11 thanks. I want to know I'll get to kill things for sure.

5 (6.5%)

Total Members Voted: 77

[Splint]

1st Granite, 204. Interm Entry.

I'm glad that madman has finally left the office of overseership. Between the nigh constant heart failure at working with this cursed metal, a spawn attack that could have killed Fischer, himself, and Ashsaber II, And them decommisioning one of my Emu, I've had a horrid time so far. I can only hope that Sus can be trusted to not be overcome by madness like Draignean was. It doesn't help that I, for lack of a better word, nearly shit my heart when I heard screeches coming from part of the fortress proper.

I must admit, early into the winter that fellow Rolf was rather impressing with the intestine lassoing of a llama (or alpaca, accounts seem to vary.) I've also notice one of our number is without a journal. Since damn near everyone carries thiers on a small chain around them, I'll have to dig one out of that lost and found bin someone set up in the mess hall so he has a means of maintaining his sanity.

Work on the weapons goes well as well. We've almost perfected the chainsword, as we're calling it, and Talvi hada flash of insight regarding a weapon that fired serrated discs of smaller scale. Mr Frog seems doubtful, but he said he'll see what he can do. She also asked why niether of us had thought to include our pikes in the research and testing, saying if the blade on the sword was so good, why not attach one to a pike? She may be a touch, well, stupid, but I must admit she can have a sort of blind idiot clarity from time to time. I can only hope I have enought ime to write again when I return to that god aweful extraction duty...


[I mentioned Fischer was a she, but after the blunder on Talvieno's part I figured a crossdressing colonel confused for a mandorf would be funnier and decided to propagate it.]

[Sus]

Downloading the save right now. I'll get to playing later today. What version is the save updated to, BtW? I'm currently running .34.7.
[/OOC]

Start your day with Mugs
This is a Giant Emu leather bound journal. It describes the reign of 'Sus' Bibandeler as the Overseer of the Dwarven fortress of Spearbreakers, starting 1st Granite in the year 204. All pendwarfship is of the most mediocre quality. It is written in a relatively humorous tone and is rambling at places. This object is menacing with spikes of Giant Emu bone, Pine and Green Tourmaline. On the front cover is an image of mugs in Limonite. On the back cover is an image of 'Sus' Bibandeler the Dwarf in Hematite. 'Sus' Bibandeler is in a fetal position.

1st Granite, 204
Thank the Gods, the Spawn horde that shambled towards our fortress has been kill'd, in part thanks to the bravery of Ashsaber th' Second, Fischer and Draignean, but mostly 'cause of the brilliant death-trap built by Mekkia. Even staked the "lady" monster leading 'em straight thru 'er black heart, it did. I don't think I've ever seen so much blood an' guts spilled all at once.

After the ungodly monsters finally stopped twitchin', Draignean declared that he'd accomplished everythin' he set out to do and was ready to give up his position as Overseer of the fortress. His last act was to appoint a successor, as is Traditional. For some reason I can' understand, he chose me. Now, I'm a simple 'dorf, one who understan's the ways o' Limonite an' Shale an' Green Tourmaline, not the complexities of managing a fortress. I never ask'd to be the boss of anydorf.

Oh well, like Talvi used to say, "If life gives ye Prickle Berries, ye cannae make +Yak Tallow Biscuits+." (Poor Talvi; she hasn' been the same in the head after th' first Spawn attack. I kinda miss her ol' folksy wisdom, tho' I still don' see what a Wren in a Featherwood tree has t' do wit' counting the days o' Obsidian...) Anyhows, Draig did point me to a desk that seems to hold the slabs an' papers doc'mentin' what he calls "the state of affairs" in th' fort, meanin' our wealth and the various work orders to be carryin' out. Just lookin' at all those numbers an' figures is givin' me a headache.

Time t' spit in me palms an' grab the ol' pick quill and pen, I guess...

[Splint]

hey now, the paperwork is my job! Anyway, glad to see you've begun. Can't wait to see how the year goes. DOn't forget to just give the randomdorfs a name so we'll have an easier time with names and keep me updated on who's been dorf'd/killed.

[Mr Frog]

Holy wow, that was a long-ass turn.

It was worth every agonizing day of waiting, though. Congrats.

I think the fact that our trade depot is also our slaughterhouse and now, apparently, our graveyard is beautifully illustrative of the fort's general character. Plus, it's good for business.


: Okiedokie, coming to trade at Spearbreakers, tumdeedum
: Entrance hall coated in blood and limbs, looks like dwarves live here, everything kosher so far, doodlydoo
: Okay, here's the trade depot, now we get our stuff ready and --
: Bob? What's that dwarf girl doing to that emu?
: Who the hell cares? She's just -- OH GOD IN HEAVEN WHY  WHY IS SHE DOING THAT  WHY'S SHE SINGING CAROLS
: Wait... are those... gravestones over there? And am I reading that one epitaph correctly?
: "In memory of Stova, who met her end --" Oh God. Oh God oh God. That... that's fucked up. Is that supposed to be some sick dwarf joke?
: I think the broker's coming.
: Good. Give him everything.
: But --
: Just give him everything so we can leave.

[Sus]

15th Granite, 204

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Wow, this management stuff sure is complex. Glad t' have Splint helping me figure this stuff out...
From what he tells me, I gather we're set up pretty good for now. We've got enough food for now, and drink production is... well, there's a bit of shortfall there, but nothing serious.

I also reviewed our military reports. From what I've read, things are pretty calm right now. Sure, there's some sort of reptile monster roaming in the caverns, but it should be cut off from the fort for now. The only other openly "hostile" things are the poor erstwhile soldiers in their isolation cells, groaning and bellowing in their own strange tongue.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I intend to take advantage of this pause in th' attacks to get all the goods left behind by th' merchants to someplace safe, so as my first official order I reclaim all of them and tell the haulers to get that junk in a stockpile somewhere. (Although I'm still a bit lost as t' where that "somewhere" would be.)

Also, hasn't anybody thought about house-training all these dogs, at least? I swear, if I step in anoth'r little "surprise" left by Dorf's best friend, they're all going to have a li'l meeting with Bombzero down at the butcher's. For now, I assign all of them to military training, save the puppies (who are also getting house-trained).
A lot of the other animals get sent ta' Bombzero's realm anyways. On can barely turn a corner here and not run into a stray donkey foal or whatever. Time to tone down the bestiary a bit. Emus, both giant and otherwise, and sheep are spared from the mass butchery for now.

Now just to figure out the rest of this mess... For example, nobody's bothered t' mark the levers around here in any way. I think Draig said something about that fancy red lever in the dining hall bein' linked to th' spikes and 'nother one that opens th' entrance bridge... As for the rest of 'em, I'd prob'ly better leave those well enough alone unless I absolutely have to try 'em.

...and where the heck are our stockpiles and workshops?

Right after the surface is declared safe again, a throng o' migrants pours in, with a fella that claims he's a "trader" and sticks around at the outskitrs o' the fort, instead of comin' in or doin' anythin' useful. What a loony... Guess I leave him alone for now; let the poor fool come beggin' to be let indoors come the next ambush...

I also send some of the guys ou t' gather plants an' fell some trees as long as we're able. One can never have too much wood in store.
Almost immediately, one of our lumberjacks gets pounced upon by a goddamn capybara, of all things. He ends up with a nasty lookin' bite to the chest. I tell the military folks to get rid of those damn giant rodents, pronto. Eventually they do, Sigun even punches one in the head so hard it drops on the spot. The wounded lumberjack is trying to limp t' the hospital.

I need a drink. Again.

Update, 27h Slate, 204
Finished assignin' jobs fer the no-good layabouts calling themselves "migrants". Also cleared all of the "jobs" Draignean has assigned himself to avoid meetin' tha liaison. "La la la, can't hear you, moppin' the floor here, la la la!" An' since that fool of a liaison still thinks Draig's th' mayor, I cannae meet 'im meself. Oh, the indignity! (Tha's a word I learn'd from one o' those silly calendars Draig kept 'round before somebody started eatin'em.)

But what's this? Me beard sense's tinglin'. Somethin' foul has come. Some kind o'... water blob?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Fortunat'ly, the thing is contained in the caverns. Let it rot there for all I care!

[Mr Frog]

Spearbreakers Lesson 1: Everything is trying to kill you. Including the cute water rodents, apparently.

[Mitchewawa]

Yaaay, timely updates.

Have we got a squad of crossbow dwarfs yet?

[Sus]

Have we got a squad of crossbow dwarfs yet?

Working on that.

BtW, there seems to be ...an issue... with the spike corridor: the yet-to-be-completed end of the corridor is, for whatever reason, deemed to have "no access" to spikes/spears. What gives?

[Draignean]

Have we got a squad of crossbow dwarfs yet?

BtW, there seems to be ...an issue... with the spike corridor: the yet-to-be-completed end of the corridor is, for whatever reason, deemed to have "no access" to spikes/spears. What gives?

Have you disengaged the failsafe?

[Splint]

Spearbreakers Lesson 1: Everything is trying to kill you. Including the cute water rodents, apparently.

I nominate this for the quotes section!

[Sus]

1st Hematite, 204
'twas an oddly calm time at Spearbreakers. Th' days o' late Spring passed idly without incident, until one o' the craftsdorfs - Strazxa I think 'is name was - started actin' all weird , rollin' 'is eyes an' shoutin' all kinds o' nonsense.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

'e ran straight fer a Craftysdorf's workshop, kickin' out the previous occupant, an' started runnin' round grabbin' stuff.

As th' inhabitants o' Spearbreakers started t' wander outside again, I noticed they found a lot o' dead migrants there, so I decided our lov'ly Shamrock o' Tombs needed expandin'. I set some miners to the task and had a pair o' Mason's workshoppes start makin' coffins fer tha poor sods.

As if pull'd in by the stench o' death, an Elven caravan show'd up outta tha blue. Got some lov'ly Barbarian blood rain on them, too. Tho' I don' think much o' tha tree lovers, I had Splint an' the mates scrounge up some stinkin' ol' (troll fur sock)s an' what hav' ye. Told Splint ta throw in a few shiny mugs ta sweeten th'deal and bought the pointy-eared buggers' whole invent'y o' booze plus some exotic animals, berries an' such. I hear sun berries make good drinkin'. Not sure what a "sloth bear" is good fer, exactly, but they sound plenty fierce so what the hey... Also giant bushtits (snicker) an' giant barn owls. Those shoul' tear at least th' Goblin scum a new one.

Hot on th' heels o' tha elves, a bunch o' Goblin ambushes strolled in town. Almost soil'd me pants when the woodcutters started screamin' "An Ambush! Curse them!"  at the top o' their lungs; was pretty reliev'd ta see 'twas just the ol' greenskins. Nothin' our militia cannae handle. At 'em, boys!
Before the militia had a go at the greenskins, they did a number on that crazy "trader" guy. Serves 'im right fer not doin' 'is job, I say!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Tholtig, always the go-getter, thought e'd take th' green menace all by 'is lonesome. Turns out, th' greenies still had some fight in 'em, so Tholtig got two broken arms an' a mangled nose an' ear for 'is trouble. 'e lost a lot o' blood, too, and fainted on the spot. The goblins then tried to bash 'is head in fer a pretty long time; thanks ta 'is -iron helm-, they dinnae quite manage to finish 'im off.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The rest o' the ambushers then tried to force their way into the fort proper, but Draignaean an' his mates had a different idea. After all was said an' done, all three o' th' Goblin raiding parties were more or less dead, along with a thief or two. I think it was ézum who pull'd Tholtig's bleedin' ass outta tha proverbial fire an' into  a hospital bed.
A pair o' war dogs also bit the big one, but all in all, we beat th' sneaky little bastards with little losses.

Meanwhile, it seems Strazxa found all the crap 'e was lookin' fer an' finished makin' whatever it was 'e was thinkin' ta make...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

STRAZXA!!! 
Of all the things... Why would' e... Ta's... Oh Armok dammit!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Tha's exactly what 'e did; all that precious Adamantine an' e' thinks to go an' make an earring o' the stuff. No shield, no armor, no spear; a bloody earring!
Welp, Splint tells me tha thing is worth 639600 ¤ or whatev'. I dinnae care. Useful things is what I want, not shiny baubles. Oh well, at least it has an inspirin' image on it.
Speakin o' which, I've started buildin' a new archers' tower right near our new entrance. Could prove useful sometime in the future, givin' I get tha Marksdorf trainin' underway sometime soon. After all, we already got some pretty mean-lookin' Spawn bone crossbows...

An' thus ends th' first season o' Spearbreakers und'r me leadership. Not a very eventful one, but knowin' this place, tha's one thing that's gonna change. Spent most o' th' time figurin' out the ins an' outs o' tha place anyhows.

P.S. Draig still strolls 'round like 'e owns the place, just 'cause that dolt of a liaison cannae be bother'd ta speak with 'im. Personally, I think that goblin's arse of a "diplomat" is just too happy ta be dippin' into our booze stocks...

Have you disengaged the failsafe?

The who to the what, now?
Which lever?

[Mr Frog]

Strazxa's pretty much a b*tch, yeah. She spent 50% of my turn Unhappy over every piddling little thing she could come up with.

[Splint]

Holy crap, Weaver the weaver is still alive!? I figured he'd have died a long time ago. He showed up during my turn!

[Sus]

Whatever became of the runt that went moody at the end of Draig's turn, I will never know. At least I don't think there was an artifact notification, so he probably went bananas while I was still trying to figure out where the workshops were and whatnot. 

[Splint]

Probably went melancholy/stark raving mad then.