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Our uniform shall be blood (red)

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Danger room training shall be forbidden.

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Total Members Voted: 0

Voting closed: April 02, 2013, 10:22:42 am

[Wastedlabor]

Wait, you mean walls can't stop everything?

[bp920091]

Nice pic, didn't know there was a DF community on desura.

I'll be joining as soon as I can get on an actual computer and not a phone

[Urist McKiwi]

OK! I'm back from my field-trip/work/thing (had a run-in with actual RL Kea on the way there. Bastards tried to steal bits of our buses). I'll play another season later today.

[CognitiveDissonance]

(had a run-in with actual RL Kea on the way there. Bastards tried to steal bits of our buses)

...really? They are like that in real life?

Edit: Giant Kea has stolen +Aluminum Bus+!

[Urist McKiwi]

(had a run-in with actual RL Kea on the way there. Bastards tried to steal bits of our buses)

...really? They are like that in real life?

Edit: Giant Kea has stolen +Aluminum Bus+!

Yeah. They're amazing creatures (although they cannot lift an entire anvil....not that this would stop them from trying)....extremely inquisitive....and they'll gladly rip exposed window/door/hatch seals and cables off vehicles. There used to be an extremely funny insurance advert featuring them. There's also been recorded incidents of them repeatedly shoplifting chocolate bars from stores. Incredibly smart, great problem-solving skills and with a beak that's designed for eating anything, including adorable fluffy seabird chicks. Biggest threat to them is the fact that they discovered that the lead on roofing nails tastes sweet.....with predictable results (if lead toxicity gets added to DF, we can try this some day).

[Orange Wizard]

I once ate in a cafe called The Wobbly Kea. There was a kea that lived in the area with only one leg.

Anyway, yeah, keas are really, really awful. They're very well-known in NZ, along with that they can and will steal anything not nailed down, and even then... yeah, lead nails sound good.

[Urist McKiwi]

I'm rather fond of them personally.

ANYWAY. Back to Moltenchannels.
Diary of Urist McKiwi II, Bombardier.

17th Hematite

I've been wandering the fortress trying to get a better feel for the place. I've pretty much worked out the important details. For starters, we're a bit low on certain materials. I've ordered some new mining and smelting operations...who knows when they'll actually be done, mind.

I wandered past a stack of cages filled with the most disgusting remnants of some poor souls. I was about to open a cage to remove one of the bodies when it tried to bite me. Why exactly are we keeping these things inside our fortress?

Spoiler: Our 'friendly' local undead pets are looking goooooooood. (click to show/hide)

We've got quite a few of these. We should probably dump them in the lava sea or something.

Adamantine mining proceeds slowly. I'm considering an attempt to wall the caverns off properly as well. That priest has been going on about how dangerous it is to mine the spires, and a few dwarves are actually starting to agree with the bastard so I'm going to pretend to humor him and shut down mining for now. We need the time to catch up with the refining operations, and it'll get that crazed lunatic off my back long enough to finish my term as overseer. I guess I could always arrange a little accident on the stairs for him, but I'm not really the type to just murder my detractors. Once the adamantine is starting to flow out of the furnaces......they'll see reason.

Still. I think that it's time to consider a retirement plan. A proper one.That priest may be mad, but I'm guessing he's got some friends out there....once I'm out of this job I'm vulnerable......it might be a good idea to lay low somewhere. And if these idiots won't see the benefits of progress, they won't mind if I take some of that progress with me.

Reading through engravings, someone must have made a really great picture of longland grass some time in the past, because there's copies of it everywhere. Not sure what the deal is. I mean, sure, it's the symbol of our government, but our engravings seem to be mostly split between some chap getting their cheek ripped off, grass, and people dying of thirst.Still, I found a hilarious one of that priest getting kicked out of the expedition leaders job. Maybe he's jealous of the people who took his job away....

I asked for an inspection of our hammerdwarves yesterday. How many turned up? ONE! And apparently that's not just direspect for my rule....it's down to the fact that we only have one hammerdwarf. We've got to do better than that....with this fort in the state it is, it's no wonder we're sealed off from the outside world! I've reassigned some more dwarves to start training. Hopefully they don't actually have to fight anything soon....if those diary-forging bastards try anything we're currently unable to beat them down.



--------------

I've also made an Emergency McDuck/Demon Containment Bridge. THere's a lever at the entrance to New What'sit(residental area low in the fortress). It gives a small level of safety given that you have maybe 5-10 seconds for it to be pulled once something goes wrong in the mining area, and there's bugger all to stop things that DO get down there. Apart from the barracks/training area for the new hammerdwarf squad. We've got 14 trainees, and I'll probably mess up the orders. Still, we'll have them equipped at the least.

As things have evolved, McKiwi II has developed some small degree of insane paranoia towards "That Priest". Rest assured however that, short of another nasty getting into the fortress, Udib Wastedlabor is quite safe. In so far as you can be safe when you're in a damp hole in the ground that has a bad case of the eldritch abominations (and sometimes giant spiders) with 166 filthy alcoholic midgets who are mostly running around in rags ranting about grass.

[bp920091]

We HAD 10 hammerdwarves.

What you see is the only survivor of a raid to kill the necromancers. They all died, to one zombie, except that dude, who was chilling in the dining hall

On the bright side, the 5 necros went away, so I guess they did their job...

[Urist McKiwi]

We HAD 10 hammerdwarves.

What you see is the only survivor of a raid to kill the necromancers. They all died, to one zombie, except that dude, who was chilling in the dining hall

On the bright side, the 5 necros went away, so I guess they did their job...

I see. So he was out getting hammered on booze while his buddy hammerers were getting hammered hammering hams*.

Still, once I've got the facilities up and running I'll tell them to train. They'll be basically useless but eh, our military is basically a decoy while we desperately try to find the levers that close the doors in this place.

* When's the last time you honestly saw an understated and quiet necromancer? They're all from the Shatner school of Ham and Cheese Acting.

[Urist McKiwi]

And our first adamantine item is.....an artifact raw-candy amulet. Made by one of the newbie soldiers, who was formerly an engraver/milker. It's a fairly boring item, but it's worth 602,400 dwarf bucks.....by far our most valuable artifact. I'm still unable to track down where the longland grass references in everything came from...I suspect it's an engraving somewhere.

We have a total of 4 adamantine wafers after an entire season of supposedly working with the stuff. I've ordered a couple of short-swords anyway.

I'll do a proper update later on. I've started "Operation Rekill the Zombies" to thin out the numbers around our walls some more. Unfortunately, McKiwi is not as good at aiming this catapult as is really needed, and no one seems to be interested in stocking the ammo piles that are supposed to supply the new catapult...so rate of fire is rather slow. I'm planning to install more of them and let more peeps operate them though.

Edit: Scratch that, I've started "Operation 'Crap we're out of booze where the hell are the stills?'"
Edit2: Migrants! More thirsty bastards to keep alive. Now where's the lever for the way in?

[Wastedlabor]

Make sure the medics didn't steal the adamantine threads for their patients. 

[CognitiveDissonance]

Make sure the medics didn't steal the adamantine threads for their patients. 

1) Create Adamantine room (large)
2) Create raw adamantine stockpile
3) Create craftsdwarf workshop
4) Channel magma in, create a smithy
5) Place a door at the entrance

All adamantine to be processed will live in this room. Door will only open to let dwarves in and out.

[Triaxx2]

One change, there should not be a door, but a hallway, with two doors. Any dwarf entering the lock is locked in until it's been verified he's not hauling Adamantine out of the room.

[Orange Wizard]

One change, there should not be a door, but a hallway, with two doors. Any dwarf entering the lock is locked in until it's been verified he's not hauling Adamantine out of the room.

In that case, we also need a magma inflow/outflow system to vaporise any dwarves who try doing that.

[Wastedlabor]

I just disable the hospital until all adamantine is processed.

Priorities.