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[Deon]

So here I am, playing a demigod character of my Genesis mod... I've found a lair, and a child emerges, screaming. I ignore him and start to loot the cave, what can a child do? Right?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

You have discovered a lair.
You hear a warcry.
You pick up the black bronze boot and put it in your cotton  backpack.
You have nothing left to wear.
You drop the cotton  shoe.
You pick up the -cobalt right gauntlet- and put it in your cotton  backpack.
The Child charges at You!
You are surprised by the ferocity of The Child's onslaught!
The Child misses You!
The Child collides with You!
You are knocked over and tumble backward!
The Child strikes at You but the shot is blocked!
You counterstrike!
You miss The Child!
The Child grabs You by the second toe, left foot with his right upper arm!
The Child kicks You in the upper body with his left foot, bruising the muscle and tearing apart the middle spine's nervous tissue through the black spider silk coat!
You are propelled away by the force of the blow!
You lose hold of the iron kite shield.
You lose hold of the black bronze battle axe.
You slam into an obstacle!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right upper arm on Your second toe, left foot.
The Child grabs You by the left upper leg with his left lower arm!
The Child locks Your left hip with The Child's left lower arm!
The Child bends Your left upper leg with The Child's left lower arm, shattering the left hip's bone!
A ligament in the left hip has been torn and a tendon has been torn!
The Child releases the joint lock of The Child's left lower arm on Your left upper leg.
You are unable to break the grip of The Child's left lower arm on Your left upper leg!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's left lower arm on Your left upper leg.
The Child grabs You by the left upper leg with his left upper arm!
The Child kicks You in the third toe, right foot with his right foot, bruising the muscle through the cotton  shoe!
You are no longer stunned.
The Child punches You in the head with his left hand, bruising the muscle and tearing the upper spine's nervous tissue through the suede cap!
You miss The Child!
The Child punches You in the left upper arm with his right hand, jamming the bone through the left shoulder's muscle and fracturing the left shoulder's bone!
The Child punches You in the right upper arm with his left hand, jamming the bone through the right shoulder's muscle and fracturing the right shoulder's bone!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's left upper arm on Your left upper leg.
The Child grabs You by the suede cap with his left hand!
You miss The Child!
The Child kicks You in the upper body with his right foot, bruising the muscle and bruising the right lung through the black spider silk coat!
You are having more trouble breathing!
You are propelled away by the force of the blow!
You slam into an obstacle!
The Child grabs You by the third toe, right foot with his right hand!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right hand on Your third toe, right foot.
The Child grabs You by the left lower arm with his right hand!
The Child locks Your left elbow with The Child's right hand!
You miss The Child!
The Child bends Your left lower arm with The Child's right hand, shattering the left elbow's bone!
A ligament in the left elbow has been torn and a tendon has been torn!
The Child releases the joint lock of The Child's right hand on Your left lower arm.
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right hand on Your left lower arm.
The Child grabs You by the right foot with his left upper arm!
You miss The Child!
The Child locks Your right ankle with The Child's left upper arm!
The Child bends Your right foot with The Child's left upper arm, shattering the right ankle's bone!
A ligament in the right ankle has been torn and a tendon has been torn!
The Child releases the joint lock of The Child's left upper arm on Your right foot.
You are no longer stunned.
The Child releases the grip of The Child's left upper arm on Your right foot.
The Child grabs You by the left upper arm with his right lower arm!
You struggle in vain against the grip of The Child's right lower arm on Your left upper arm.
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right lower arm on Your left upper arm.
The Child grabs You by the first toe, right foot with his right hand!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right hand on Your first toe, right foot.
You miss The Child!
The Child grabs You by the scale shirt with his right lower arm!
The Child punches You in the left upper arm with his left hand, shattering the bone through the black spider silk coat!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right lower arm on Your scale shirt.
You miss The Child!
The Child grabs You by the left upper leg with his right upper arm!
The Child punches You in the left hand with his right hand, fracturing the bone through the woolly mountain goat wool left glove!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right upper arm on Your left upper leg.
The Child grabs You by the third finger, right hand with his right hand!
You miss The Child!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right hand on Your third finger, right hand.
The Child grabs You by the head with his left upper arm!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's left upper arm on Your head.
You miss The Child!
The Child grabs You by the fifth toe, left foot with his left upper arm!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's left upper arm on Your fifth toe, left foot.
The Child grabs You by the second toe, left foot with his right upper arm!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right upper arm on Your second toe, left foot.
You miss The Child!
The Child punches You in the left lower arm with his left hand, bruising the muscle through the black spider silk coat!
The Child grabs You by the tongue with his left lower arm!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's left lower arm on Your tongue.
You miss The Child!
The Child grabs You by the left hand with his right upper arm!
The Child punches You in the left hand with his right hand, shattering the bone through the woolly mountain goat wool left glove!
The Child locks Your left wrist with The Child's right upper arm!
You miss The Child!
The Child bends Your left hand with The Child's right upper arm, shattering the left wrist's bone!
A ligament in the left wrist has been torn and a tendon has been torn!
The Child releases the joint lock of The Child's right upper arm on Your left hand.
The Child punches You in the first toe, right foot with his left hand, shattering the bone through the cotton  shoe!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right upper arm on Your left hand.
You miss The Child!
The Child grabs You by the left upper arm with his left upper arm!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's left upper arm on Your left upper arm.
The Child grabs You by the third toe, left foot with his right upper arm!
You miss The Child!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right upper arm on Your third toe, left foot.
The Child grabs You by the scale shirt with his right lower arm!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right lower arm on Your scale shirt.
You miss The Child!
The Child punches You in the left upper arm with his left hand, fracturing the bone through the black spider silk coat!
The Child grabs You by the second finger, right hand with his right upper arm!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right upper arm on Your second finger, right hand.
You miss The Child!
The Child punches You in the right lower leg with his right hand, fracturing the bone through the leather trousers!
The Child kicks You in the right eye with his right foot, bruising the right eyelid's skin through the black spider silk coat!
The Child grabs You by the black bronze boot with his right lower arm!
The Child punches You in the left lower arm with his left hand, fracturing the bone through the black spider silk coat!
You miss The Child!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right lower arm on Your black bronze boot.
The Child grabs You by the chitin waterskin with his right upper arm!
The Child releases the grip of The Child's right upper arm on Your chitin waterskin.
You've lost possession of the suede cap.
The Child strikes You in the left hand with his suede cap, bruising the muscle through the woolly mountain goat wool left glove!
The Child punches You in the right upper leg with his left hand, fracturing the bone through the black spider silk coat!
The Child strikes You in the left foot with his suede cap, fracturing the bone through the black bronze boot!
The Child strikes You in the upper body with his suede cap, bruising the muscle and bruising the left lung through the black spider silk coat!
The Child strikes You in the right foot with his suede cap, bruising the muscle through the cotton  shoe!
The Child strikes You in the left hand with his suede cap, jamming the bone through the left wrist's muscle and shattering the left wrist's bone!
The Child strikes You in the right upper arm with his suede cap, jamming the bone through the right shoulder's muscle and shattering the right shoulder's bone!
The Child punches You in the left hand with his right hand, shattering the bone through the woolly mountain goat wool left glove!
The Child strikes You in the upper body with his suede cap, bruising the muscle and bruising the heart through the black spider silk coat!
The Child strikes You in the right upper arm with his suede cap, shattering the bone through the black spider silk coat!
The Child punches You in the lower body with his right hand, bruising the muscle and bruising the stomach through the black spider silk coat!
The Child strikes You in the right hand with his suede cap, fracturing the bone through the woolly mountain goat wool right glove!
The Child strikes You in the right lower arm with his suede cap, jamming the bone through the right elbow's muscle and shattering the right elbow's bone!
The Child strikes You in the right foot with his suede cap, jamming the bone through the right ankle's muscle and shattering the right ankle's bone!
The Child strikes You in the left lower arm with his suede cap, bruising the muscle through the black spider silk coat!
The Child strikes You in the right hand with his suede cap, bruising the muscle through the woolly mountain goat wool right glove!
The Child strikes You in the lower body with his suede cap, bruising the muscle and bruising the stomach through the black spider silk coat!
The Child strikes You in the right lower leg with his suede cap, fracturing the bone through the leather trousers!
The Child kicks You in the right upper leg with his left foot, fracturing the bone through the black spider silk coat!
The Child strikes You in the left hand with his suede cap, shattering the bone through the woolly mountain goat wool left glove!
The Child strikes You in the lower body with his suede cap, bruising the muscle and tearing the lower spine's nervous tissue through the black spider silk coat!
The Child kicks You in the lower body with his left foot, bruising the muscle and bruising the guts through the black spider silk coat!
You feel sick!
You are propelled away by the force of the blow!
Your left upper leg skids along the ground, bruising the muscle through the black spider silk coat!
You slam into an obstacle!
The Child strikes You in the right upper leg with his suede cap, fracturing the bone through the black spider silk coat!
The Child strikes You in the left upper leg with his suede cap, chipping the bone through the black spider silk coat!
The Child strikes You in the upper body with his suede cap, bruising the muscle, jamming the right true ribs through the right lung and tearing the right lung!
You are having more trouble breathing!
The Child kicks You in the right foot with his left foot, jamming the bone through the right ankle's muscle and shattering the right ankle's bone!
The Child strikes You in the lower body with his suede cap, bruising the muscle and bruising the guts through the black spider silk coat!
The Child strikes You in the right lower leg with his suede cap, shattering the bone through the leather trousers!
The Child strikes You in the upper body with his suede cap, bruising the muscle and bruising the left lung through the black spider silk coat!
You are having more trouble breathing!
You have suffocated.

Those freaking kicks! Each of them sent me flying (and the first one broke my spine). What the hell! I look him up in legends and...

It appears that at 9 years old he was confronted by a werewolf spearmen who STABBED HIM IN THE HEAD and then bit him. So it's a freaking 9 year old werewolf with a scar across its face who kicks powerful armored warriors into pulp... This game is amazing.

P.S. To sum that long fight up, he kicked me in the upperbody which sent me flying and broke my spine. Then he quickly punched both of my arms in succession, breaking both shoulders at once. Then he proceeded to beat the shit out of me with my own hat, breaking all bones, and eventually kicked me again which sent me flying again, and I suffocated... Sick.

[WaffleEggnog]

Only in this game, would someone write be able to post a forum topic about a kid roundhouse-kicking you until you suffocate.

What were his stats? Did he have any skills, or was he strong and tough? Or was he just generally a badass with a spear-shaped hole in his head?

[Il Palazzo]

No. The Child of Chuck Norris has found you.

[nanomage]

That's more or less your own making Deon Vanilla werecreatures aren't half as tough as that.

[Deon]

Well yeah, I've buffed them here and there... But he did not turn yet! I mean vanilla werecreatures only turn once per month, that's terrible. My werecreatures also turn when they are badly wounded!

No. The Child of Chuck Norris has found you.

That's more or less your own making Deon

Did you just call me Chuck Norris?!

[Il Palazzo]

Man, this has so many philosophical implications!

Can Chuck Norris produce a child that even he couldn't defeat?
What came first, Chuck Norris or his child?

[Mesa]

The principle reason why I love this game.
Redefines the term of "replayability".

[Urist Imiknorris]

You're welcome.

[Big_James_B]

Now I understand why you were trying to coerce me into playing Genesis on the Fallout Mod page Deon...

[sackhead]

i don't know deon if it realy was Chucks son the combat log would be shorter...
something like

The Child kicks you in the Throat jaming your Spine through your brain.
The severed Spine fly of in an Arl
You have bean Struck down

[Deon]

He just learns.

[Kamamura]

That's one spoiled brat, and I have seen my share! No candy for you, until start behaving!

[Sergei]

Man, this has so many philosophical implications!

Can Chuck Norris produce a child that even he couldn't defeat?
What came first, Chuck Norris or his child?

Chunk Norris came first. Roughly 9 years 9 months ago.

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

i don't know deon if it realy was Chucks son the combat log would be shorter...
something like

The Child kicks you in the Throat jaming your Spine through your brain.
The severed Spine fly of in an Arl
You have bean Struck down

Alternatively: the child wanted to cause more pain.

[SquatchHammer]

i don't know deon if it realy was Chucks son the combat log would be shorter...
something like

The Child kicks you in the Throat jaming your Spine through your brain.
The severed Spine fly of in an Arl
You have bean Struck down

Wow Metaphysically kicked so hard that it didn't even leave enough mass to make a k. So the spine is now flying in an Arl whatever the fuck that is.