Turn 20Tell the mug to shut up, and continue to duel my counterpart.
6 vs 4Use the power of my chanting to continue the chant even louder and more ominously than before.
2Blow away Anti-Anna with my shotgun.
If that fails, parry her attack with Ripper.
2 vs 4-1(Adventurers vs Anti-Adventurers)
5-1 vs 6(Cows)
4Aaron commands the Mug to stop its chanting and it goes silent. Possibly because of the divine command, or maybe it just ran out of power at that moment. In any event, the power boost from its chanting vanishes. Anna goes for the kill with her shotgun, but her doppleganger knocks the weapon aside. The sparks and blasts of the colliding ripper and ballistic fist make for a terrifying lightshow. The evil adventurers ultimately surround and slay their opponents. They begin dragging the bodies away to present them before Caesar-ATHATH. The dragons continue their dogfight after their collision. After rapid-fire exchanges of claws and fire, Aaron kicks the feral dragon through a building that then collapses atop it. The other dragon bursts through the rubble with a defiant roar.
The cow looks on with mild envy as the brahmin drinks from a puddle with one head and grazes with the other.
Forage for wild berries, nuts, or even small animals. Cook them and eat them. Climb the hill to see how the town is doing.
6You take to the wilderness with a primeval fire in your spirit. You swing on vines, fashion spears, and hunt for prey. As a great elk roasts over your campfire, you attempt to look for home. You find you can't actually remember where Moorsburg was.
Imic now has +1 on primitive skills, -1 on civilized ones.
"Why am I not using the weapons god gave me?"
Kick the cultist in the gut then beat him to death with my fists.
4-1 vs 2(Arm vs Cultist)
6 vs 5-1You decide you don't need a weapon to fight the good fight. You beat down the brick-wielding cultist barehanded and the Arm finishes him off with punches to the forehead.
"This is growing increasingly frustrating..."
Okay then. Blargh. Create a permanent portal back to the mortal realm. Then travel to the Mug Dimension. This time, properly.
6, 1(Seems like the Mug Dimension doesn't want you around.)
You create the permanent portal to the mortal realm from the champagne dimension and step through. However, it's a portal to a dimension that's effectively an ocean. You get blasted from behind by the enormous flood of champagne following you.The local valley floods around you and batters you wildly. You throw Mug Dimension portals around at random in hopes of escape. Eventually one of the new portals hits the champagne portal and closes them both. You're left hanging at the top of a damaged tree over your new lake.
"Bull's Strength!" Attempt the palisade again. A shame that Roy isn't here with his ranks in Knowledge: Architecture.
5, 1+2You dig out a scroll of Bull's Strength and get a somewhat acceptable fence of stakes up. This really would be easier if Roy or perhaps Durkon were around.
Name: Bothadtam
Description: Bothadtam is a sentient suit of armor. Bothadtam is also lonely, and wants to make friends on his journey to acquire milk.
Why do I want milk: Bothadtam recently ran out milk to lubricate his joints with. Bothadtam does not like when his joints are not lubricated, because they are squeaky and feel funny. Bothadtam would like to have a lot of milk so he can always have lubricated joints.
Action
See if I can find a friend. I would like a friend.
5You are Bothadtam the sentient armor. You decide to find a friend. You wander around the gloomy castle in which you presently find yourself and hear some loud noises. You go to investigate and find an adventurer fighting the vampiric Lord Saxon. Perhaps the adventurer would be a decent friend, or maybe Saxon isn't as bad as he seems.
Repeat again, more loudly.
1You lean back to shout at the top of your lungs, but end up simply freezing in this awkward position when the alchemist unexpectedly replies.
"Oh, hello sir," says Cassandra, more than likely grimacing at the yelling. "Well... I suppose I could part with it in exchange for some herbs and fungi. The more rare they are, the better."
Learn from my mistakes. Write down the steps I took to figure out what went wrong with the mixture.
5You send the noisy interloper off on a hunt for some useful ingredients and get back to your work. You immediately realize that the missing ingredient standing between your potions and a masterpiece was insane yelling. You quickly put corks in the bottles as smoke starts to leak out. You now have sets of spider venom and antitoxin that works as gas grenades.
"Oh, hello sir," says Cassandra, more than likely grimacing at the yelling. "Well... I suppose I could part with it in exchange for some herbs and fungi. The more rare they are, the better."
Learn from my mistakes. Write down the steps I took to figure out what went wrong with the mixture.
"Very well! I shall do as such!"
It wasn't bolded, but I'm assuming this was an action.
1You go looking for the ingredients. You don't find any of the items that the alchemist wanted. You do encounter a dead troll being eaten by grubs, a charred house with arachnid legs, and a grove of 50 irrelevant foxglove plants.
mission complete. kick Lord Saxon so he falls out of the balcony. I doubt that would kill him but it would at least buy a few seconds.
2+1 vs 2(Dogs)
6+1 vs 6-1Lord Saxon's hounds charge you and you cut them down with your new sword. Lord Saxon becomes corporeal to yell at you and you knock him over the balcony. He tries to turn into smoke, but isn't fast enough. He hits the ground with a thud before slowly beginning to float back up. A friendly-looking suit of armor wanders into the room from behind you.
"FUCC. WELL, TIME TO DESTROY THE SUN."
Turn the sun into a FUCKING COLD HUNK OF TUNGSTEN FLOATING IN SPACE. Yes, I am fully aware of the apocalyptic consequences here.
3+1 vs 5I need to save the sun, ok, I'm a luxturgist, this shouldn't be to hard.
"NO SUN IS MORE FUN."
Be this known, oh wicked goat man
The sun will still shine on this land
For if you wish for life to end
Then to another world, you I shall send.
"OH, WE'RE SINGING NOW. OR WAS THAT POETRY? FUCKIN' SLAANESH AND THEIR ARTISTS. ANYWAY, I'M DEFINITELY DESTROYING THE SUN NOW."
Oh, I won't stop you with that.
Rename ATHATH to be "the sun."
Resist. If that fails, just rename myself back immediately afterwards.
3 vs 6"FUCC. WELL, TIME TO DESTROY THE SUN."
Turn the sun into a FUCKING COLD HUNK OF TUNGSTEN FLOATING IN SPACE. Yes, I am fully aware of the apocalyptic consequences here.
Assist.
3Annoyed at his failure to corrupt the Sun, Goatsby resolves to destroy it. ATHATH helps, of course. Adam tries to redirect the spell into ATHATH with a bit of nominative redirection that ATHATH successfully resists. ATHATH sends a bit of psychic aid to Goatsby, which is enough to complete the task. Or at least it would be if the disturbance hadn't been enough to finally wake up the Sun. The Sun, almost visibly, rotates in the sky after shrugging off the puny
goat human magic. Everyone in the world hears a booming telepathic voice in their minds.
"ALRIGHT, LISTEN UP SCUMBAGS! WHEN I STARTED OUT HERE, THINGS WERE GOOD AND QUIET. AFTER A WHILE, PLANET 3 SHOWED UP. IT WAS GOOD AND QUIET. THEN YOU ORGANIC FREAKS STARTED SQUIRMING AROUND. I PUT UP WITH IT WHEN THOSE CREEPY PLANTS STARTED HOARDING MY LIGHT. KINDA STALKERY, BUT ALRIGHT. THEN THE MEAT DISASTER HAPPENED. I PUT UP WITH THAT EVEN WHEN YOU IDIOTS STARTED YELLING AND KILLING AND DEFECATING ALL THE TIME. I TOLD THE AZTECS I NEEDED SACRIFICES. WHY AREN'T YOU DOING THOSE? I LIKE IT WHEN THE GUY PULLS THE HEART OUT. ANYWAY, NOW YOU ACTUALLY WENT AND TRIED TO KILL ME?!? THAT'S THE LAST STRAW.
HERE COMES THE SUN, SCUMBAGS!!!
This seems bad.
OOC:Well, Mallos, ATHATH. You went and angered the Sun. I hope you're happy with yourselves.
Apologies to Clickhole.
Author
Topic: Minimalism and Milk 2 (Read 161943 times)