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Author Topic: Smallhands - nearly 40 years and still tiny!  (Read 441010 times)

recon1o6

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1110 on: May 30, 2021, 02:12:08 pm »

Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 24th of Felsite 175

Tonight was one of the happiest nights in dwarven history. I destroyed the slab legally. Everyone was celebrating and I burned through every drink I had in stock at the bar. Not that it stopped someone dragging an entire stockpile's worth up here when I asked.

I decided to commemorate this event with a statue. A masterwork to be precise and I shall forge it by my own two hands!
Well..that and a handful of others of the events leading up to it.

It will take me some time to decide the materials and placement. Especially placement

Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 16th of Hematite 175

Summer has arrived and with it that blasted humidity that spreads the goblin goo through the air when it sould be confined to the goblins.

I do wonder how the goblins manage to avoid being fevered by that stuff. Probably because its weevil messiah's curse or something on everything dwarven. The osprey man we have in the cages isn't affected by it after all.

Little to note in the overseers records other than pumping system on the magma weapon is proceeding slower than I hoped, but on the plus side salmeuk informed me that the inflow channel is complete. All we need to do now is knock down the wall

Spoiler: primary piping (click to show/hide)

In other news mayor Avuz has been relected over myself.


Normally I'd take umbrage at this offence, particularly one with such a poor record, but she mandated 3 floodgates.
As much as I'd like to use that as an excuse to put myself back in supreme power, I must admit that IS actually an item the fort is going to need for the magma works. I'm not sure if she wants to pour magma on goblins, is trying to get into my good graces or she noticed that I recently filled the hammerer position again, but whatever it is she's earned a few months yet.


Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 16th of Malachite 175

While I am an exemplary example of a dwarf, more than worthy for my name to be passed into legend, I am not perfect. I didn't even know we had llama wool till Salmeuk assigned me to make some cloth out of it


Our animals have been breeding these last 3 months faster than Auze drinks a barrel. Exaggeration of course, nothing can beat the speed at which Auze drinks when he's thirsty, but the sheer volume of beak dogs, alpaca foals, puppies and rabbits would be enough to strike down any human invasion from the cuteness. Us dwarves being made of sterner stuff simply appreciate that the animals have thoughtfully bred when our meat stock is down to 6

After much deliberation I decided on two important things. First, the release and refill levers for the Tall Bar shall be located, where else, in the Tall bar. They will have our artifact mechanisms Lelgassarek "Lush echo" and...

Ara-nudist. "Sculptedpleats"

The latter is definately going to be referred to by sculptedpleats when having dialogue with humans lest we want them to laugh themselves silly

The second thing I noted is that I am going to need to interrogate our illustrious manager as to which overseer ordered MY solid gold and gem encrusted tables and chairs installed in the library and not my tavern!
Still I need to smith some more gold funiture anyway, and some other things

A beer stain mixed with ink covers the parchment

Imbecile! I get Tonnet is in a fey mood but he could at least look where he is going!



"TONNET I WAS USING THAT INGOT" I yelled as I sprinted down the stairs after he swiped it from my workstation, when I was in the middle of making sterling silver no less! Too late though, he had already thrown it inside the magma smelter. Begrudgingly I headed back up and reported my job cancellation.

This better be good

Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 4th of Galena 175

After last month's stunt I was tempted to lock Tonnet inside his workshop and let him go insane when he decided on a whim that his artifact needed fresh rough gems, not the dozen or so knocked out of the stone work on an empty floor in my search for more gold. Recognising that if he was stealing metal from his overseer's own work, I decided otherwise since he was clearly training to become a skilled metalworker of some kind. An industry that, once again, my insane/obsessive/murderous/forgetful/sober/unfortunate/elf loving predecessors blantantly ignored our shortage of in favour of their pet projects.

To prove this point, I had the Tall Bar's roof get some copper walls installed to control the flow of magma as it pours out onto the goblins. During an inspection I sketched some of our workers and their progress



With the access complete and the roof being made, I peered through the window and observed Elpho tossing a *pig tail mitten* onto the ground after he built a piece of floor, causing Radiofort to complain that he has to now suspend construction on the floor below due to an obstruction.

Looks like the pump stack is going as slow as ever.


My rising frustrations were interrupted by Tonnet bursting into the tavern waving quite possibly the most beautiful yet deadly sword I have ever seen. My jaw dropped when I got a closer look and saw the blade was made of Platinum of all things!


I might be cynical, and I might be in a death laden fort at the end of the civilised world, but if this is where I will start an age of dwarves, then I am more than glad to have crafters like him behind me.

Hmm...it might be time to get the armourers guild restablished after most of its members were slain. I saw someone there earlier giving a demonstration.
Metalworkers of smallhands seems like a feasible goal. Better than a dirty, elven farmers guild at any rate
« Last Edit: May 30, 2021, 02:19:43 pm by recon1o6 »
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auzewasright

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1111 on: May 30, 2021, 10:31:10 pm »

Another excellent part, well worth the wait, also:
My rising frustrations were interrupted by Tonnet bursting into the tavern waving quite possibly the most beautiful yet deadly sword I have ever seen. My jaw dropped when I got a closer look and saw the blade was made of Platinum of all things!

Too bad that Platinum is roughly on par with Silver and Copper as edged weapons materials go. If it was a blunt weapon like a mace or hammer... still a fantastic sword.
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Radiofort

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1112 on: May 31, 2021, 07:51:02 am »

Well done, Recon! It seems we'll finally have our Dagor Bragollach device in fortress.
By the way, if I remember correctly the mechanics of wildfires, there must be something on the ground under magma flow to take a fire to flames start spreading. As Smallhands is in the desert (so no saplings to set ablaze), maybe we need to prepare a stock of worn mittens & other crap at the bottom of the tankard.
Too bad that Platinum is roughly on par with Silver and Copper as edged weapons materials go. If it was a blunt weapon like a mace or hammer... still a fantastic sword.
It's an artifact, so, afaik, you can treat it one tier higher, a bronze-level, probably.
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recon1o6

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1113 on: May 31, 2021, 11:20:58 am »

Look at it this way, its a sword made for mordhau and our dwarves at least do pommel strikes a lot. It will make a good stunning weapon even if it doesnt kill

Personally, I always like to mod in platinum blunt weapons as a counterpart to adamantine for sharp weapons.
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Garfunkel

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1114 on: June 02, 2021, 02:26:56 pm »

This is a pretty damn impressive succession fort! Well done, everybody.
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Radiofort

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1115 on: June 05, 2021, 10:13:12 pm »

Umm, Recon?
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recon1o6

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1116 on: June 06, 2021, 08:45:54 am »

Sorry for the delay, had an extremely busy week


Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 17th of Galena 175

Contemplating war against goblins is easy. Contemplating war against goblins controlled by a demon in league with the greatest evil the world has known requires a lot more planning. Naturally several tankards of alcohol help, particularly when I observed in our records that despite our supposed "alliance" with the humans and the pointy eared bastards, only dwarven kind is actually doing anything productive about the goblins.

If we are to fight their battles, then we should be compensated for our trouble. To that end I dispatched squads to demand tribute and a trade caravan to GlimmeredSanctum (the current elven capital as it were) and Frenzyescort (a large human town nearby) I would personally be more than happy to drive the elven traitors to extinction. Other overseers may forget the visiting elven prince, but I certainly didnt. No elf visited during spring to trade and most of the way through Galena and no human caravan to trade either.

Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 27th of Galena 175

Those traitorous knife ears, how dare they reject us! Do they expect us to fight on their behalf for free? I will not stand for this!



A new beer stain and angry dwarven scribblings and tactics cover the parchment

I really should have seen it coming too. The elven government's translated name is apparently "The Equal Snarl" and that is a goblin name if I've ever heard one. If the mountainhomes continue to be insufferable and driving the mad and useless to smallhands, then I will send orders to put the elves out of our misery and use their settlements to bolster our forces agains the goblins

Fortunately, the humans apologised for their mistake. Apparently their diplomat and trade caravan were intercepted by a goblin force from StableVile shortly after a raid and they gave us some materials as compensation. I was very pleased to receive the 47 barrels of beer. Its not dwarven but certainly fine stuff nonetheless



In the interveening period between dispatching trade delegates and weaving masterworks I opted to have the siege breakers do some soldiering for once and begin our march towards Dimplesteal
It was time to raze StableVile, a goblin lookout post to the ground.



The twits came back within the day having stolen some livestock. I sent them out again and they returned, again with more beak dogs. I was getting pretty annoyed at Ustuth disobeying my explicit orders to raze it to the ground and made it clear they won't have any more alcohol until that place is destroyed.
He then explained to me that what they were doing was razing the vile stable to the ground exactly as ordered.

I apologised for the miscommunication and pointed out that it wasn't just the cavalry building that was stablevile but ALL of the goblin settlement. He then rallied his men and set out once more.

Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 5th of Limestone 175



Mestthos stumbled into the fortress dabbing at his head with a *cave spider silk hankerchief* and announced that the caravan from the mountainhomes had arrived. I told Auze to finish his dinner (I don't blame him for taking his time, a masterwork sheep kidney roast pie) and then get down to the trade depot. In the meantime I went to Salmeuk's office to prepare for the liason's arrival while Salmeuk was sleeping through another meeting.

Salmeuk may be an exemplary example of a noble, but he does unfortunately display traits of nobles we dwarves hate with a passion. Like not doing his job when it matters.
Along the way I witnessed another child playing with a grown wood toy. I thought I got rid of those things years ago. Guess one snuck back in via my successors. A shame but i will have to send another child under the drawbridge.

For all her babbling and insanity, Quasar did mention one thing that I can personally verify. All this goblinite needs melting and any of their clothing needs disposing of for health reasons. Mestthos actually asked us if he could buy it for the mountainhomes. When I enquired why he mopped the sweat off his forehead and answered the mountainhomes was hoping to test out whether spears or axes were better at cutting through the under armour clothing of the goblins.

Auze popped in at one point ot grab another barrel to drink. Apparently merchant wagons were still arriving! he'd counted 7 wagons when he left and an 8th on the way down the ramp. He also reported a job cancellation for Sakzul



More gold? at this rate i will need another term just to get the furniture completed for the tall bar.


Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 11th of Limestone 175

Nearly a week its taken to start trading. In the mean time I dragged Mestthos to listen to the latest military report



Do you see WeevilMessiah? Your little minions avail you nought as they cower and flee before the might of smallhands. My only regret is I couldn't join the destruction myself.
I might see about getting some of our excess members of the fort to go and claim StableVile and turn it into a dwarven outpost. We are still above the number in the Queen's Charter.

Auze set about trading as I browsed the items on offer. 2 of the 11 wagons the mountainhomes sent to use were full of leather and another full of fish. Best of all, the first plump helmets I had seen in years! I could begin brewing dwarven wine again!

Considering we weren't offering much in terms of actual dwarven items for sale, it seems either this trader Mikot was bad with numbers or Auze had an extra pint this morning because we bought 14396 urists of goods, and paid it with junk. The transaction slip Auze gave me said that Mikot had a 19743 profit and he was absolutely ecstatic about the trading.

I confess, he isn't the only one. We got barrels of fish (which we don't get any of here) multiple bars. An exquisite iron pick that was studded with platinum, about 50 plump helmets, tons of meat, parchment, a few instruments and ores.
While my personal preferences are of equal importance to the fort, I can't help but admit the fort has done well out of this trade even if I didn't get the gold bars and armour I hoped for.
I think I'll ease off on insulting the mountainhomes for a while since they have more than made up for the humans and elves being useless.

An interesting observation occured to me in the course of designating items for Auze to trade- we have a surprising variety of creatures locked in cages.
I sold everything elven and all non meltable goblin items. A few buzzards and other small animals were sold as well. I bought a breeding pair of rabbits because you can never have enough rabbits. They make for good dinner, pets and leather and breed quickly.

post trading stocks



Avuz eventually took over diplomacy duties after Mestthos got his act together and Salmeuk decided to perform hauling duties as a political statement.

"The world is the same as ever" Mestthos began, mopping sweat.
"No mate, its not. We just destroyed Stablevile. Also a deific slab thats bound to Ikud the Blind because his god decided to pick a fight with smallhands"

Mestthos paled and jotted it down in his goo spattered notebook. Why he hasn't replaced it after 20 years is beyond me.
"Er...well its the same outside of Smallhand's territory...Anyway here's the export agreement."
"Mestthos...did you know that the elves were in league with the goblins?"

Mestthos's beard went even greyer when Avuz asked that. Avuz is certainly going up in my eyes.

"Um..yes, yes of course."
"Then why are we still in an alliance with them?"
"The queen thinks we could use the elves as a go between to broker peace with the goblins."
Me and Avuz looked at each other.
"The queen or the idiots around her?"
"Nobody knows"

I sighed and left the room. Avuz later came out and explained that though the leadership at the mountainhomes is in a chaotic mess what with the war and backstabbing, the head of trade over at the mountainhomes is smart enough to both keep their name quiet to avoid assassination and to send the biggest caravan's to the outlying settlements.

Spoiler: the export agreement (click to show/hide)
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Radiofort

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1117 on: June 06, 2021, 12:36:05 pm »

Great job, Recon! Green blood for the God of Blood!  8)

It's also good to have plump helmets in fortress again. I was feeling kinda nervous without them on my turn.

If I recall correctly, there must be another captured hillocks about 100 heads of population, and after that there'll be only our captured Mountainhomes and Dimplesteal in goblin's possession. Also, it seems that most of goblin defenders on missions are always trolls (as war animals). I wonder if we may require adamantine to slay a lot of trolls without harming our soldiers...

I think elves, on the other hand, are not worthy of our soiled blades for now. After all, they're so weak that we may take care of them any time.

Also, may I ask you to check legends and find out what actually happened to Ikud the blind demon? Was he affected by slab's destruction in any way?
« Last Edit: June 06, 2021, 12:39:15 pm by Radiofort »
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delphonso

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1118 on: June 07, 2021, 07:09:54 am »

A new beer stain and angry dwarven scribblings and tactics cover the parchment

I doubt there is an unstained parchment anywhere in Smallhands at this point - the blood, sweat, and booze probably have ruined many books by now.
Great updates Recon!

I would guess the slab is counted as missing and the demon is unphased, but that is just my pessimism. I'd be happy to be proven wrong.

recon1o6

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1119 on: June 07, 2021, 12:17:00 pm »

Unless something has changed, artifact destruction is still impossible outside of DFhack in fort mode, they simply get hidden.

So if it IS invisible in fort mode, that basically means it is destroyed for all intents and purposes. If I did the exact same thing in adventurer mode, then it would be destroyed.
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recon1o6

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1120 on: June 12, 2021, 11:23:18 am »

New job certainly took a lot of time away from me. Question regarding pumping magma- does anybody know if the magma in the stack throughout the fort is powered or not?
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Radiofort

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1121 on: June 12, 2021, 11:18:50 pm »

New job certainly took a lot of time away from me. Question regarding pumping magma- does anybody know if the magma in the stack throughout the fort is powered or not?
I'm not sure what do you mean by 'powered', but water pumps create a small torrent in their output point and I don't think magma pumps should work any other way. Though I don't think flowing magma in the pump can power up the pump itself in the current version (this could be done in a distant past, but, afaik, Toady fixed it back then).
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Salmeuk

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1122 on: June 13, 2021, 02:50:39 am »


Mestthos stumbled into the fortress dabbing at his head with a *cave spider silk hankerchief* and announced that the caravan from the mountainhomes had arrived. I told Auze to finish his dinner (I don't blame him for taking his time, a masterwork sheep kidney roast pie) and then get down to the trade depot. In the meantime I went to Salmeuk's office to prepare for the liason's arrival while Salmeuk was sleeping through another meeting.

Salmeuk may be an exemplary example of a noble, but he does unfortunately display traits of nobles we dwarves hate with a passion. Like not doing his job when it matters.


Guilty as charged.

Well done (as always).
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recon1o6

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1123 on: June 15, 2021, 02:01:11 pm »

update tomorrow, too exhausted tonight. work decided to fuck with me and my schedule. Barely had any food all day and my "short day" got turned into overtime. Hayfever, heat and tiredness have not helped.
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recon1o6

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Re: Smallhands - it's like a tiny home but filled with ghouls
« Reply #1124 on: June 16, 2021, 03:28:02 pm »

Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 7th of Sandstone 175

Today is a momentous day, at least for Rovod Monomolok. The wily bugger is now an adult and continue the farmhand's path. Until I lose patience again with the lack of armoursmiths.




It was also an absolutely horrible day. An oversight in the design for the pump stack had almost resulted in a large pile of unneccessary expenditure of mechanisms and a planned trip to the caverns in search of nethercap for magma proof axles.
The previous design would have required multiple axles and gears to power the entire thing. Instead I merely had to give the uncomfortable order to rip out all the ones we had in place and remove some flooring the hauliers built.

The oversight in question was that a constructed wall and single urist of floor space could not support a pump stack by itself without tipping over, thus the design for a large assembly of machine components to fix the stack. As it turns out by installing a gear mechanism at the top of the stack on the maintainence floor, and removing the floor underneath the purification module (the so called dark half due to all the pollutants being removed from there) then the topmost pump could be suspended by a single gear mechanism and each pump connected underneath would be safe from falling.


Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 27th of Sandstone 175



I've finally had enough of Morul's tantruming. This is the third time in as many weeks. Zultanking had gotten restless and so I gave the order to arrest the vandal.
I get it, she was wounded doing some hauling work and the animal broke her nose, neck and some of her forehead. The doctors cleaned and sutured everything and even prescribed extra alcohol for the pain and the Smallhands Steamy Slime.

20000 stress and gaining. Hopefully some time in prison would help.


In the mean time, I came across this amazing statue lying in the stockpiles just sitting there. Its a masterwork commemorating the 25th anniversary of smallhand's founding. I am going to have it placed in the entrance hall so everyone who passes in or out of smallhands can see it.



I will certainly drink to that
A strawberry wine stain in the shape of a mug is on the parchment


Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 1st of Moonstone 175

Winter is here. A chill wind that somehow seems lighter than usual this year. Its either the magma or the fact we wrecked Weevilmessiah's precious spire.
Sadly the same cannot be said for Morul. She's...not taken the jail time well and got beaten too.

She's breaking. I'm talking 88000 on the stress chart according to Doctor Imic. Mayor Avuz noted she appeared to be very lonely and afraid of being hurt again which is probably why she hasn't tantrummed again. I think I can guess why. She's married to Nezclaw...and she's cheating on him with Sibrek, a metalcrafter.
Clearly both of them shunned her recently and Zasit, her only albeit close friend, got into an argument with her, I think over the merits of friendship. Zasit believes it is one of the finer things in life whereas Morul...finds it a waste of time.

In any event, I have sent her down to work in the magma forge. The entirety of Timber was wasted by many dwarves upon hearing it was Smallhand's anniversary. Barley any tasks got done and nearly 4/5 dwarves were socialising or reading instead of getting the magma system fixed.

At least the floodgates are now designated




Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 11th of Opal 175

Bad news; the buzzards around the fort have been a nuisance again. Mayor Avuz actually got thrown off some stairs by one when it attacked her. she lived but is wounded. Honestly, its better to say that she is lucky to be alive after that much of a drop off the Tall Bar

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

She's said she is not going to stand for reelection while she recovers and thus the new mayor is...



That's...not who anyone was expecting. Especially when she is afflicted with crippling shyness and fled in tears after being told she had won.

Solon's ghost cropped up again. It knocked out one of the military cold. I forgot to have that slab installed. I'm starting to get annoyed at all these wounding incidents, they are slowing down what little productivity this fort produces. I have suspended the glass and cloth making because of the lack of hauliers to build the power source of this great weapon.

Windmills. We dwarves bend the earth to our will, and a fort across the sea replaces the ocean with land as they seek the greatest of fish, so why not have the sky brought low as well? The wind around here shall turn our pumps and rain fire on those that dare interfere with our great fortress. We who will stand above the gods and hells forever!



Another design flaw cropped up. The stairs are in a bad position. I will need to move them otherwise we might have leaks that burn down the pump stack.


I'm running out of time in my current mandate. At this rate, I will need to bend time to my will in order to...by what booze laden shenanigans did you two perform to get up there? That's on top of the magma glass! Get down you imbeciles!



and the rest of you can stop gawping and get back to work. This WILL be completed by the end of my term!

Cider and magma stains colour the *forgotten beast parchment* underneath them is a mess of stair construction, removal and windmill calculations


Journal of the Tavern Keeper Overseer 31st of Obsidian 175

START THE REACTOR! THREE CHEERS FOR SMALLHANDS!!!

Multiple alcohol goblet stains line the parchment of varying drinks




A few days after I gave that command the reactor is still filling up. After much effort and frustration, i have managed to get enough dwarves working the old pump stack to manually pump lava up from the magma sea.
However, I was not to be deterred, I went up to the Tall Bar to host the 25th anniversary of smallhands and new years party. I didn't even need to ask for quiet when I strode over to the levers.

"Smallhands! Today we stand at another milestone in our great history! Above you is the flame of the earth! Below is where we shall burn our enemies to ash were they not cowering in their goo soaked walls and hiding in beyond the trees. I am proud to present to you the Frothy Fire!"
After a smattering of applause

"From now on, we can and will pour magma on those goblins whenever the opportunity presents itself. No more shall we need to waste the living and undead among us on turning back the horde. We will make the earth itself our weapon. Now get yourselves to a suitable viewing room and prepare the for the first firing!


Most dwarves scrambled for the staircase eager to get a closer view from the gem windows. Some of the best stood behind. Salmeuk, Radiofort, Quarque, Zultanking and Auze.



"The frothy fire isnt the best name Recon" one of them said. I groaned and agreed.
"Look, I know...but its literally the froth on this mug shaped monument. There was also the fact it got voted on by my patrons last night."

There was a collective facepalming from around the room.

"Anyway...can any of you smell burning?"
Zultanking looked out the window and muttered "oh no"
We all went to have a look





...fuck





------------------------------------------------------------------
Notes for the Frothy fire

-The centre lever is the rooftop access. It controls the floodgate to the south of the tall bar for if/when repairs are needed
-The entire thing is powered by 5 windmills. Axles might need to be reconnected after the accident
-I've made and demolished lots of stairs. There's a column of them I didn't finish dissassembling, do that until the floor below the machinery platform as that's got the pump stack access path and we don't want climbers
-Nogood's pump stack I don't believe is connected to the water reactor or if it is, I didnt fill it in time and had to use dwarf power. If you can connect it and fix the leak at the top, then we can bring magma up very quickly. Otherwise you will need a lot of dwarf power
-Nogood's pump stack for that matter can be vastly improved. The current one is extremely power intensive. To be precise, it needs 1500+ power when it oculd be rebuilt to use a fraction of that without all the gears. You would need ot remove the magma though.


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Other things to note:

The fort is getting really short on certain labours. Like carpentry, metalworking and stoneworking.
Morul is currently at max stress. I don't know how she hasn't broken yet.
the goblins apparently reclaimed stablevile

https://dffd.bay12games.com/file.php?id=15575 save is here. Good luck!
« Last Edit: June 16, 2021, 03:32:22 pm by recon1o6 »
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