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[Flodeklojo]

just made a magma cistern and filled it up. In the middle of it is my central staircase, surrounded by a wall of course.
"Time to channel out the tiles above the magma so i can build those furnaces..."
*channels out tiles next to stairs* ... magma levels drop ... "hmmm, what's going on?" ... sees his mistake ... *facepalm*

So i punched through my cistern wall and the magma is now flowing down my staircase. Luckily that part of the fort is unused.

[AWdeV]

Thrice damned evil cave crocodiles and bloody stupid dwarfs.

Cave crocodile appears. Murders the fuck out of random idiot #1. I send marksdwarf squad down to murder it. I don't pay attention because it's a solid 50 z-levels down through several passages and the game is slow. Militia Captain seems to be in front. He's an elite marksdwarf.

I look away for a minute.

Wrestler is dead. A recruit, shot once or twice, got mauled, became wrestler, died. Elite marksdwarf militia captain? Went back up thirty stairs to "store item in bin".


HAAAATE.

[Pandimo]

Mason locked away for ages, finally emerges having constructed the awesome Atolteshkad Ruthoshfastam, the...

door.

phyrite, btw.

[Ultimuh]

Mason locked away for ages, finally emerges having constructed the awesome Atolteshkad Ruthoshfastam, the...

door.

phyrite, btw.

Let some noble have it for his/her room.

[AWellTrainedFerret]

Oh man, I'm on a roll with this current fort. It's year 6, and periodically for some strange reason the raise brudge I use to seal off the bottom cavern level seems to keep lowering it's automatically. Only one death so far thanks to the military who have managed to efficiently kill off herds of Drathas, a Cave Croc, a few Giant Moles, and one FB who was made of nothing but feathers and vomited webs.
But I have just realized the problem. That bridge is linked to two levers: the one it's supposed to be linked to...and the lever opening my trade depot.
I have no clue how this happened.

[Ultimuh]

I have no clue how this happened.

Well.. It does.. happen.. 

[FrisianDude]

.. sigh. As I was building a washing-station two of my Dwarfs were pushed into the lake beneath it by the water coming from above (which I shouldn't have opened yet). One of them simply trudged out and the other drowned one tile away from a ramp to oxygen JUST at the moment where I was saying "hurry up or you'll drown." She was a surgeon, too, and I don't think I can reclaim the body because the lake is attached to an underground sea.

Edit; phew. I should pay better attention to when I pit goblins, because the last one fell from -46 to -60 to land on top of one of my Dwarfs, causing both to be stunned (but survive without wounds) and the Goblin then almost had another chance at murdering another Dwarf but luckily he caged himself instead of killing anyone. I think he'll get a do-over.

[Clutzy]

Just after Lullgilt was finished with one siege, another with over a hundred gobbos and trolls comes along. As my military is decimated I decided it when the cage traps couldn't work I would then close the doors and hole up. It wasn't until one particular section got over-run and I had a look-see to discover a stairway that I had completely forgotten. This meant I had no hatch covers. *facepalm* So ends Lullgilt. Because of lack of hatch covers.

[Nil Athelion]

I decided to assault some special place with my herd of legendary militia.  Took me a while to find a way down, and I channeled a lot of holes into the magma sea so Dwarven echolocation would work.  The assault didn't go that great, and while my soldiers died, I walled it all off behind three layers of constructed wall.

So at least I was safe.

And then there were horrible horrible things running around all over the lower levels.  I later figured out that I had turned off the temperature in a previous fort for frame-rate reasons, and my unwanted guests were simply swimming through the magma sea to all the listening holes.  Oh.

[Vehudur]

Put grates over your "listening holes".

[Sutremaine]

I have a burrow that encompasses the whole map bar a section of corridor that is used to run enemies. Not only did I forget to switch the burrow on, but a bogeyman-loving planter wandered into the corridor just in time to plant himself in the ten squares between the military and the opposition. I like to think that he realised that without day and night cycles in the fortress he would have no way of ever seeing the object of his fascination, so he decided to go out with a bang observing the antics of something even better.

On the plus side, I did learn about the limitations of steel armour and now have an even healthier respect for the defensive capabilities of my steel-clad military.

[Orky_Boss]

In my current (Also my first) fort, at the beginning, when I had decided to begin mining for metal and gems and other @#$%, i had only dug 3 layers and had found 'something' called hematite. Surprised I had already hit something, I decided to ignore it. If I had already found it within the first 3 layers under my fort, it couldn't be that important for my fort, right?

right?

Well, about a year later, after I had a troglyte-whatever problom that cost me a few dwarves, I decided it was about time to see my smelter was capable of making any metal so I could get some weapons and armor for my damn militia (It's still full of peewee scout recruits, so I don't think they deserve to be considered a proper military yet). I click 'add new task' and find right underneath 'smelt metal object' 'smelt hematite ore'. I decide to see where it is, and see it near my starting dig point. After that I looked up hematite in the wiki and found out that it was an ore for iron.

In other words, I have been digging around to find copper or silver so I can make my first basic weapons, only to realize a year later that I've had @#$%ing iron hiding in plain sight.

[Nil Athelion]

So my current fortress is composed of mountain (cliffs) bordering lake and terrifying woodland.  So that my fishermen would be safe, I dug a hole out of the cliff so they could fish away from all the scary stuff.  Unfortunately, the lake is temperate, and froze over.  I dug out a pit for a draw-bridge to go over, but it wasn't completed when I found this werewolf running around my fortress, chasing people.  I am pondering my options, and hoping I can trap it with some forbidden doors when he chases a whole slew of my dwarves down the hallway, and out onto the ice.

Now the ice has melted.  Remind me to not let werewolves chase people around, and to at least have a lockable door so that this stuff doesn't happen.  Having my one legendary miner drowning is a bit too much fun for me.

Why facepalm?  Because I left the door open so the dwarves outside could get back inside, because I was under the impression that werewolves did not go indoors.

(The kicker?  The werewolf didn't drown - he left the map on the lake-bed, exploring east.)

[BeforeLifer]

In my current (Also my first) fort, at the beginning, when I had decided to begin mining for metal and gems and other @#$%, i had only dug 3 layers and had found 'something' called hematite. Surprised I had already hit something, I decided to ignore it. If I had already found it within the first 3 layers under my fort, it couldn't be that important for my fort, right?

right?

Well, about a year later, after I had a troglyte-whatever problom that cost me a few dwarves, I decided it was about time to see my smelter was capable of making any metal so I could get some weapons and armor for my damn militia (It's still full of peewee scout recruits, so I don't think they deserve to be considered a proper military yet). I click 'add new task' and find right underneath 'smelt metal object' 'smelt hematite ore'. I decide to see where it is, and see it near my starting dig point. After that I looked up hematite in the wiki and found out that it was an ore for iron.

In other words, I have been digging around to find copper or silver so I can make my first basic weapons, only to realize a year later that I've had @#$%ing iron hiding in plain sight.

Welcome to DF my freind, You can put your sanity infront of the giant dwarf and here is your complemtary ‼MAGMA‼ bath! *pulls lever*

So my current fortress is composed of mountain (cliffs) bordering lake and terrifying woodland.  So that my fishermen would be safe, I dug a hole out of the cliff so they could fish away from all the scary stuff.  Unfortunately, the lake is temperate, and froze over.  I dug out a pit for a draw-bridge to go over, but it wasn't completed when I found this werewolf running around my fortress, chasing people.  I am pondering my options, and hoping I can trap it with some forbidden doors when he chases a whole slew of my dwarves down the hallway, and out onto the ice.

Now the ice has melted.  Remind me to not let werewolves chase people around, and to at least have a lockable door so that this stuff doesn't happen.  Having my one legendary miner drowning is a bit too much fun for me.

Why facepalm?  Because I left the door open so the dwarves outside could get back inside, because I was under the impression that werewolves did not go indoors.

(The kicker?  The werewolf didn't drown - he left the map on the lake-bed, exploring east.)

Ya did you know that if a miner is drowning i think he can a stairwell to get him out, not sure but if you dig a up staircause and a down staircause next to the pound i think he can both dig that out and use it. Not sure for the firs though. But if you got a miner nearby just dig a channel, much faster and easier.

[Theifofdreams]

Also your morals and normal ethics will be carved into fine statuesque works of art, and then sunk to the bottom of the magma sea.
Here we have !!Fun!!, !!Science!!, and !!Magma!! to replace those. We find they work better.